twinges

I have been feeling a little twinge lately. A tiny twinge at first {which resulted in a few posts with inspirational quotes}, that turned into more of a little tugging {and thinking, but no writing}, that turned into a desire to get a little deeper here on my blog. I was inspired by my good friend Jenny, as she starts writing A True Story on her blog. And then, I read this blog post today and it spoke to me as well.

Jenny's posts made me want to open up a little more; the post on The Fresh Exchange made me want to take some more time for reflection. So, here starts it. Bear with me, as I am not exactly sure what this deeper, more reflective part of me looks like yet, but I would like to see what comes from it. And here goes nothing...

I do not like living in Florida. I find the people to be cold and unfriendly, the architecture to be undesirable, and the landscape to be a little too flat. In all fairness, I know that not every person here is cold and unfriendly, but I have encountered an amount of rudeness that crosses my acceptable threshold. I also concede that not all the architecture is ugly; I have seen some beautiful historic buildings and lovely homes. But on the whole, the "Miami" aesthetic that is Miami Beach/South Beach just assaults my dwelling sensibilities (art deco gone bad). The landscape would be argued by many to be beautiful, but mountains are in me and a resort-lined beach will a vast blue ocean just cannot hold a candle for me.

Certainly, there must be things I like about Florida, or more specifically, Miami and Coconut Grove. Why, yes, there are. However, the three "dislikes" I mentioned tend to overshadow and outweigh the good parts.

I am a big believer that things are what you make them. My struggle since moving to Florida has been to not let my negativity (read: homesickness for Colorado) permeate my experience of my new home. I will be the first to admit, however, that my struggle has often times given way to some wallowing. I like to close my eyes and imagine that I am back home in Colorado. Lately I have been asking myself, what does this accomplish? Yes, it is nice to reminisce, but at some point does all this "imagining myself back in Colorado" keep me from living in the now. This quote that I posted a while back really says it well. When I first read that quote and posted it, I felt like it reminded me to live in the now but that is something that I easily forget to do, especially these days.

So, I wanted to get it off my chest once and for all that "I do not like living in Florida" ... fair enough, I feel I am entitled to that opinion and assertion. Yet at some point I need to practice more of what I preach in terms of "things being what you make them." I don't know if I am completely over this hill yet or not (that's figurative, mind you - as I mentioned there is no elevation variation in Florida); in fact, I have to admit that I am not. But, I am working on it. I may never love Florida, and I may always miss Colorado. That's fine. In the midst of those facts, though, I need to live my happiest life wherever I am.

My happiest life ... I need John and Mocha. I need my family. And my friends, old and new. I need fresh air and time in nature. I need good food and I need to keep moving. Just my luck, I can have all of that ... even here.

{the photo above was taken on South Beach on Miami Beach by me back in July}